And...

...he's not ready for a relationship (he says). Yup...what I thought had such promise has already crashed and burned.

I've been placed on a moratorium (by Erica) for a month: no guys/no crushes/nothing.

My friend Rod yesterday tried to tell me that a) I'm still not over Justin (not true) and that b) I like anyone who's nice to me and will sleep with me. Wow. That was nice, eh? It made me feel like I'm sort of a whore.

I'm not a whore. Maybe I've been a bit overboard lately (aka since November), but I'm not a whore.

And I really like(d) this guy. He wasn't a distraction to get over Justin. I like "R" for who he is and really did feel there was something there. Or, that there could be. Again, my feelings tend to get hot much faster than others (apparently).

And, as far as "break ups" go, this was the nicest/kindest, most civil, least asshole-ish I've ever had...thus far in my 29 years. He keeps waiting for me to be mad at him.

That might happen in a month or so...it did take me a while to be mad at Justin, remember...

Anyway...so, it's finito. At Mark and Katrina's wedding last night...I had large moments of self-pity. It's really hard to be around a TON of people who are coupled up (most of the high school folks that Mark and I know from BHS are married. Many have kids...meanwhile most of Katrina's friends have been dating their sig others for eons. Not a lot of singletons in either group) when you're single and particularly after you just were dumped.

Argh...so, that's it. I guess now I can fully concentrate on planning for the fall. Whee?

Grrr

Well, I'm single again. Yup, Young'En & I are over. Yeah, I'm a little surprised too (since I'm sure if you read my last post you thought things were pretty much going ok).

Apparently my instincts about his not calling me were spot on. He did call me yesterday--to break up with me. Yup, on the PHONE. How lame & cowardly.

Can you tell that I'm mad?

I'm hurt though too, don't get me wrong. But, the mad is the main feeling right now. His reasoning seemed lame & like a cop out. Whatever...

I'm just going to keep telling myself that now I can fully concentrate on my student teaching. Kinda loser-ish since I already felt like I had such a miniscule social life, but what can ya do?

I just really don't get it. Like, aside from the not talking thing--it seems to have come out of nowhere. What the hell? And, in the grand scheme of things, on an attractiveness scale? I'm way more attractive than he is. So how come I got broken up with, huh? WTF?!?!!

Well, at least we have a snow day today & so then I don't have to face my "precious" little students. Whoopty fricking whoo.